THOUGHTS: When did Love Letters Die?

6 (1)

When did love letters die? When did the craftsmanship of words faded? When did pouring out your feelings into black and white
became a few punches of letters in our phones? I would give any day to receive any letter like this.

You fear, sometimes I do not love you so much as you wish?

My dear girl, I love you ever and ever without reserve.

The more I have known you the more have I loved. I every way, – even in my jealousies have been agonies of love,
in the hottest fit I ever had I would have died for you. You are always new
The last of your kisses was ever the sweetest, the last smile the brightest, the last movement the gracefullest.

When you passed by my window home yesterday, I was filled with as much admiration as if I had then seen you for the first time.
Even if you did not love me, I could not help an entire devotion to you,
how much more deeply then must I feel for you knowing you love me.

I never felt my mind repose upon anything with complete and undistracted enjoyment — upon no person but you.
When you are in the room, my thoughts never fly out of the window, you always concentrate my whole senses.

John Keats to Fanny Brawne

THOUGHTS: Love Letter (June 2013)

What a year it has been for us! You have filled almost two years of my life with so much pain and heartaches but most of all, happiness for coming into my life. We are the definition of love & therefore it includes both the good times and the bad.

There were shorter than 12-hour breakups, misunderstandings and non-sense fights. There were rants and moments of isolation. There were tears and meeting the parents – scene, career meltdowns, beating me in badminton, movie releases and dining out. We’ve come a long way down a strange and sweet road since then.

It warms my heart to look back and see how much storms and stresses we have endured together.

We must never forget the countless nights and days I’ve cried myself to sleep because of work and wondering what got me through them? I pulled my strength from you. You have been so wonderful, my Jude, all throughout those dark and lonely times. When I needed love, understanding and encouragement, you brought it to me.

There is pride and also gratitude when you call me yours. There is pride that, yes. You picked me out of the thousand other prettier and smarter people than I. And yet, you picked me above all my flaws and imperfections. And for that, I am grateful more than I can show you.

I love you beyond the classic hit song and the greatest poem that which I cannot write.

I would live in an abyss, a desert and a world full of darkness if I ever lost you, a colorless and meaningless existence. So bid me farewell, never for I will do anything to never lose your heart and even chase you in all the ends of the world for your love.

There’s nothing in the world that I want but you – your attention, love, companion and loyalty. But most of all, your precious and most endearing love.

In every beautiful place, I wish you were there. Never leave my side, I plead.

I can’t help loving you more than what it is good for me. So please hurt me never intentionally. And treat my heart with care.

I miss you, always. And just imagine the ache of it all when you don’t see me or when we part and I don’t see you for days nor even touch your hand or stroke you hair or kiss your sweet lips. Just imagine the burden you’re causing me when you leave me.

I’m handing you my heart and everything you’ve claimed there. There is not one smallest part that you have not possessed and you have the absolute power over it.

We continue to grow in love and passion for each other; I hope and continue to learn from each other.

My love and my reverence for you grow each and every day.

I love you my first and last.

I love you my dearest liebster.

I love you fiancé and the to-be father of my kids.

I love you my love, my life, my all.

Happy 1 year and 1 month.

Forever to go.

THOUGHTS: Love Letter (May 16 2013)

Eating quick dinners with you on weekdays is not enough,

Can we extend it to having our breakfast in bed?

Watching new movie releases with you is not enough,

Can we extend it to watching teleserye or watching TV on a lazy Sunday morning?

Writing these letters to you is not enough,

Can we extend it to post its on our refrigerator, bathroom mirror or our dining table?

Talking to you on the phone is not enough,

Can we extend it to talking beside each other during wee hours after our intimate time?

Driving me home when you can is not enough,

Can we extend it to going home at the same house?

Shopping clothes with you is not enough,

Can we extend it to buying our weekly and monthly groceries together?

‘See you soon’ kiss is not enough,

Can we extend it to good morning kisses after opening my eyes every morning?

Playing badminton with you on Saturdays is not enough,

Can we extend it to going to our child’s first badminton / basketball game?

Sending singing voice notes is not enough,

Can we extend it to singing lullabies to our children?

Meeting your family is not enough,

Can we extend it to having our own family?

Being your someone is not enough,

Can I also be your other half, your wife, be Mrs. Montoya someday?

Kissing you is not enough,

Can we extend it to kissing you in public, in front of the priest with god’s blessing?

365 days with you is not enough, Can we extend it to forever?

I love you, always and everyday.

P.S. Please wear it. It adds up to your handsome feature.

– A hoodie minus the hood, a gwapo clothing added to his handsome features. Plus a heart full of stars. :))) Of all the stars in the sky love, you are my north pole. You are what brings me home. I love you. One white star for my YES. – A thousand times over YES, Love.

I love youuuuuuuuu.

I hope that one day, I can be a reflection of you, mom.

If I only have a minute to live, I would tell my mom that I love her so much.

I will tell her that she’s pretty. She always has been. Even for her age. I will tell her that my friends think that she has blue blood running through her veins because she looks mestiza in her own way with a fair skin and a little dapple of redness in her cheeks and skin. I will tell her that she has a beautifully well-defined cheekbone and that although my siblings and I, including my father teases her most of the time because of her nose, it is one of her good traits and a magnet for compliments.

I will tell her that she’s my hero; my idol and that I look up to her. I want to be just like you, mom. I admire your commitment to your job. But I definitely advice you to take some rest – at least when it is on weekends and after office hours. I know that you want some self-fulfillment, being able to transform PAL into something better than how it was handed to you. You also need to set aside time for yourself. We want to be with you on weekends and it is okay to treat yourself once in a while. You should try new things and explore yourself more.

I admire you for putting up with Lolo Marcos. I am aware that he hadn’t made life easier for any of you. I admire you for stepping up, being the father of the house, for protecting Lola and for financially supporting the family and sending yourself to school. I am proud of you, of how long you’ve gone from being a piano teacher to being at the top of all the corporations you’ve been into.

Mom, thank you for everything. This may often be said a lot by children to their parents but I mean this from the bottom of my heart. I am grateful for everything that you’ve done for me.

I know that pregnancy equates to a lifetime worth of pain. But you chose to raise the three of us. With each pregnancy adds an inch to your hips but you decided to be healthy for us to be born bouncing and chubby babies. Thank you for bringing us into this world.

Thank you for always bringing me to the doctor when I have my asthma attack and for carrying me, even though I’m such a pig back then. Thank you for allotting your Saturdays with me to go to Dr. Canlas and for putting powder behind my back and everywhere else and for coming to my family days when I was in grade school. 

Thank you for being there and pushing me up when I’m down especially regarding my work. I know that I have been such a failure and you always made me feel that everything will be okay and that you were proud me, no matter what.

I learned a lot from you. From placing a pillow behind my knees at night, from always combing my hair, adding belt to pump up a look, putting color to my eyebrows, putting shampoo every other day, using petroleum jelly to moisten my lips and a million other small things.

I learned the difference from wrong and right, how to treat our house helpers, how to be generous and how to treat your colleagues. I learned that things may not appear how we want them too, but it is how God planned it to be and that for every experience, there’s a lesson that we can learn from.

I got my diction from you. I can still remember how you would always remind me to read the newspaper aloud every morning. I appreciate the times that you would come home and have a goody in your hands just because you thought that I would look pretty in that dress. Or how I would love a box of Tropical Harvest or a bottle of nutella.

I appreciate the times that you will skip work after I called you that I’m dying of dysmenorrhea, bring me hot compress and hot soup in the dorm and be with me until I get better. Thank you for always picking me up on weekends from the dorm and for always waiting for me to come home when I’m out late with my friends. I appreciate the times when you would swing by at Rada just to bring me dinner and check up on me. I appreciate the times when you would place cold towel on my forehead when I have fever.

I kept you awake when I cried at night, even now that I’m older; you still wait for me to come home. You carried me when I was a baby, even now that I’m older, you held me when I’m down. You taught me how to speak, even now that I’m older, you still teach me what and how to speak when I seek your advice. You taught me how to walk; even now that I’m older, you teach me where to go and which path I should take.

You may not be the coolest mom, but you were certainly the kind of parent that we need in order for us to grow in the image of God. And for that, I’m grateful.

But all of this won’t fit in a minute. So what I’ll tell her instead is that I love you. You are my heart. All of me wouldn’t be anything if it weren’t for you. You are the best mom and that I’m grateful for every single thing.

P.S. When you grow old, I will still accompany you to have your nails painted – I know that it is one of your joys.

Happy Mother’s Day, Ma! I love you!