BOOK: It ends with us by Colleen Hoover

GOODREADS: Sometimes it is the one who loves you who hurts you the most.

Lily hasn’t always had it easy, but that’s never stopped her from working hard for the life she wants. So when she feels a spark with a gorgeous neurosurgeon named Ryle Kincaid, everything in Lily’s life suddenly seems almost too good to be true. As questions about her new relationship overwhelm her, so do thoughts of Atlas Corrigan — her first love and a link to the past she left behind. He was her kindred spirit, her protector. When Atlas suddenly reappears, everything Lily has built with Ryle is threatened.


When you love a person, you believe them. You believe their promises, their lies and just about anything. You believe in the goodness of their hearts. You believe in their intentions and you believe and hope that they will change.

As the story progressed, I am in awe of lily’s character. As vulnerable as she is, it took a lot of strength to take control of her life, even if there was a child on the way.

  • I feel like everyone fakes who they really are, when deep down we’re all equal amounts of screwed up. Some of us are just better at hiding it than others.
  • There is no such thing as bad people. We’re all just people who sometimes do bad things.
  • You’re already my favorite person but now you’re making it really unfair to all the other humans because no one will ever be able to catch up to you.
  •  I like you. Everything about you. Being inside you, being outside of you, being near you. I like it all.
  • All humans make mistakes. What determines a person’s character aren’t mistakes we make, it’s how we take those mistakes and turn them into lessons rather than excuses.
  • Life is a funny thing. We only get so many years to live it, so we have to do everything we can to make sure those years are full as they can be. We shouldn’t waster time on things that might happen someday or maybe even never.
  • Maybe love isn’t something that comes full circle. It just ebbs and flows, in and out, just like the people in our lives.
  • Just because we didn’t end up on the same wave, doesn’t mean we aren’t still a part of the same ocean.
  • In the future, if by some miracle you ever find yourself in the position to fall in love again, fall in love with me.
  • Just because someone hurts you doesn’t mean you can simply stop loving them. It’s not the person’s actions that hurt the most. It’s the love. If there was no love attached to the action, the pain would be a little easier to bear.
  • She left someone she loved so that her daughters would never think that kind of relationship is okay.

My heart simply breaks for both Lily and Ryle. :/  How can you ever willingly give up someone you love and choose yourself? I think Domestic Violence happens to a lot of relationships, not just to women. But only a few brave souls can have the courage and strength to do what lily chose.

I think it makes it even harder if you love the person. It is never easy to just leave and end things. Coho taught me that right choice will always be the hardest ones. I hope I never get the chance to ever be in the same position.

PONDER: All of us

We all have shit days every now and then. All of us. No matter how perfect we aspire to be, and no matter how many tings we promised ourselves we would do, sometimes all the things we wanted to achieve just can’t happen in one day and that is perfectly okay. – momentary happiness


PONDER: Be your own Hero

These are not my words. It’s something I want to share and keep here so I can read it whenever I need to be reminded.

Don’t stop being who you want to be – who you’re willing to become – just because people have a painting of who you’re mapped out to be. Focus on yourself. Challenge yourself. Become the person you know you can become. Don’t let anyone make decisions for how you’re going to be or where you’ll end up. It’s not their story you’re writing. It’s yours. Let change be your own. Let who you are be a cause for the kind of change you want in your life. You have the ability to make your own choices and the capability to lead your own life.

Be your own change. Be your own savior. And most of all, Be your own Hero.

  • -Braverhope


The young may not like this but here is a truth to consider:
Sometimes it takes 10 years to get that 1 year that will change your life.
 I spoke and trained for 12 years doing talks pro-bono until that crucial year the opportunity came and turned professional.
Many want to short cut the process wanting instant success. Doesn’t work well.
There is always a process before you can get to achieve long term success. And here is the catch. The process continues. 
— Francis Kong

THOUGHTS: ’18 Year End Post

In 2018, I turned 27. 10 years ago, I thought by this age, I already have a very successful restaurant or that I’m already at the top of the corporate ladder and won an YMMA award. There are things I’ve dreamed of owning at this age such as my own house, my own car, a very fat bank account which can last a luxurious life for 5 years.

In 2018, I traveled to one of my bucket list places; New York. It’s surreal to look back on it. It’s only my second time in US and though I would have wanted to explore new countries, I am grateful to tick this one off. 😀 I also got to spend time with relatives. I know my mom has been itching to visit her siblings and I know how happy she was to spend time with them.  We were also introduced to one of our cousins there: Brandon.

In 2018, Our family got bigger. My sister finally gave birth to Elle, my goddaughter and she is beautiful and special. I cannot believe how much my sister grew and matured just by being a mother. It’s exciting to see her blossom like that for her child. I finally met Kyle, the son of one of my closest cousin. My cousin Marc also found out that he will be having a kid. ❤ My cousin Derek also was blessed with a new Rodriguez Baby Girl. Lastly, my cousin Alexis also welcomed a baby girl Zoey.

In 2018, I found out I have lumps. I guess it’s teaching me not to ignore APEs. I found out I have 4 and 3 in my breasts and several lumps in my uterus which needs to be monitored. But thankfully, nothing that we need to worry about in the near future.

In 2018, I graduated and earned the three letters, MBA. My journey in earning the degree has been filled with tears, coffee, tons of pressure and grit. I’m glad that’s over but I’ll be missing everything about it too.

In 2018, I got engaged. I still can’t understand how I feel about it. It’s all sort of mixed emotions. I’m beyond happy and excited to start living our married life. I want to skip the wedding preparations and the wedding and jump off to living and facing everyday with the love of my life. But I feel extremely sad to be leaving my family too.  I didn’t know I would miss everything so bad. I cannot believe I will not be spending everyday with them.


There’s a lot of things that didn’t go as I planned it to be or how I imagined it to be. But I’d like to think that this is what God has planned for me and I know that he knows what’s best, even if it’s not what I prayed for. I’d like to think that this is where I’m supposed to be.


In 2019, I plan to save more. Not just for the wedding but I’ll try to avoid a lot of mini expenses such as going for 3in1 cofee or 711 french vanilla than Starbucks or opting to walk (cause it will do me good) or FX than booking a Grab or just simply pausing before buying anything new.

In 2019, I plan to stick to basics. In relation to saving more, I plan to only buy clothes that are basics. I’m planning to stick with White, Black, Gray, Brown and all its shades of family.

In 2019, I plan to stick to my weight goal, 97. The ideal goal for my height is 107 – 140 but since I don’t have an active lifestyle, I’d like to keep it to 97. Also, I plan to make it a habit to do a 5 minute of anything workout before taking a bath every morning.

In 2019, I plan to read more books. I’m glad I surpassed my 2018 goal of 20 books. ❤ My goal for this coming year year is to stick to 20 since I’ll be super busy. BUT, I’ll spice it up by following a reading challenge this time.

In 2019, I plan to be more grateful, appreciative and understanding. Things may not work out but I hope to see the good small things that I am blessed with.


I’d like to say all of my plans but it might bite me back in the ass if I promise to do something I know I’m not committed to, so I’ll stick with what I’ve written here. I have faith that this coming year will bring more blessings and positive changes and transformation in my life and the people that I love.

Regardless of what happened this year, it’s been pretty amazing and I’m looking forward to 2019 with an open heart and mind. And here’s to praying for a better version of Janna. ❤

P.S. I look awful when blowing something. I just realized. 😀



  1. Find a Guy who has the urgency to tell you everything
  2. Find a Guy who can’t sleep without you by his side.
  3. Find a Guy who will grab your waist and spin you to dance with no music.
  4. Find a Guy who is proud of you and ready to tell the world who you are to him.
  5. Find a Guy who introduces you to his family, friends and colleagues.
  6. Find a Guy who starts his morning by making you smile.
  7. Find a Guy who never forgets to say Good Morning or Good Night
  8. Find a Guy who makes you feel attractive.
  9. Find a Guy who makes you feel like you’re the only woman in the room.
  10. Find a Guy who makes sure you feel loved and respected.
  11. Find a Guy who will go to any lengths to take that IG-worthy photo of you.
  12. Find a Guy who makes you laugh so hard your tummies hurt.
  13. Find a Guy who you can have impromptu videoke road trips with.
  14. Find a Guy who will take you on surprise road trips.
  15. Find a Guy who never forgets to kiss you hello and see you later.
  16. Find a Guy who still gets excited when he gets to take you out on a date.
  17. Find a Guy who plans for exciting dates without being asked.
  18. Find a Guy who you can be quietly still with.
  19. Find a Guy who you can call when you murdered someone & plans to dump them in a river.
  20. Find a Guy who listens to you.
  21. Find a Guy who pays attention and remembers the little details about you.
  22. Find a Guy who gets the flavor that you want just so he can give you his when you still want more.
  23. Find a Guy who keeps his promises.
  24. Find a Guy who actually wants to bring you home because he wants you safe.
  25. Find a Guy who finds you hot and beautiful at the same time.
  26. Find a Guy who stimulates you intellectually.
  27. Find a Guy who knows you’re worthy of anything.
  28. Find a Guy who finds time to give you handwritten letters.
  29. Find a Guy who hugs you from the back just because he wants to be near you.
  30. Find a Guy who still tells you you’re beautiful and you can see he’s sincere not because it’s a sweet gesture.
  31. Find a Guy who kisses you mid sentence because it’s painful for him not to kiss you at that moment.
  32. Find a Guy who respects your opinion even if it contradicts his.
  33. Find a Guy who will discuss politics and religion with you.
  34. Find a Guy who thinks you’re attractive when you tell him about the book you’re reading.
  35. Find a Guy who puts perfect guys in novels to shame.
  36. Find a Guy who is in pain when he sees you crying.
  37. Find a Guy who kisses you hungrily because he thinks you’re hot and beautiful and extremely attractive.
  38. Find a guy who doesn’t lie.
  39. Find a guy who tries not to disappoint you.
  40. Find a guy who listens to what you want and what you don’t want.
  41. Find a guy who says sorry and doesn’t repeat his mistakes cause he knows how valuable your forgiveness is.
  42. Find a guy is more than happy to bring you along on barkada nights.
  43. Find a guy who willingly updates you his whereabouts, someone who doesn’t need to be asked.
  44. Find a guy who’s not afraid to try new things.
  45. Find a guy who can protect you, not the other way around, someone you feel safe with.


If more than half is missing, stay single. It will do you good.

THOUGHTS: 90s Computer Games

​Do you remember the times when all the games can only be played in your desktop computer? when you had to wait for dismissal time and go home just to play? Do you remember the time when you would patiently write all the pass codes for a certain level so you can go back to it when you miss a turn and die during the game? 
2 weeks ago, we were cleaning our desktop computer at our house and I managed to dig a bag full of CDs.
I do! and I have several favorites. ❤   
Wikipedia: Chip’s Challenge consists of a series of 148 two-dimensional levels which features the player character, Nerdy Chip, often called just Chip, and various game elements such as computer chips, buttons, locked doors, water and lethal monsters. Chip should be able to collect enough chips to open the chip socket at the end of each level, get to the exit and move on to the next level. 
This is my MOST FAVORITE one because this is the most challenging. I can still remember all of my siblings are watching when one is playing to watch the tactics needed to move to the next level, to anticipate what the new challenges are. I love that there’s an element of ice, fire, moving objects, monsters that hinder you. My favorite level? I forgot the numeric one but it’s the level where there were no walls but chips to collect endlessly but there’s a monster running after you. 
WikipediaFreddi Fish is a yellow fish who takes on detective investigations throughout the series. Her best friend, a green fish named Luther, goes with her on all her adventures. The series sold more than 2.5 million copies and won over 75 awards of excellence.
This is definitely my second favorite since it goes on an adventure. He meets several people who will give him clues and gives him jobs to accomplish. Plus, who doesn’t want to see what goes on under the sea? 
Wikipedia: When Putt-Putt hears on his radio that there a pet parade is coming to Cartown, he really wants to be in it. Before he can enter the parade, he must find a pet and a balloon, and get cleaned at the car wash. After that, Putt-Putt goes to talk to Smokey the Fire Engine to borrow his lawn mower, so he could make some money to use the car wash. He goes to Green Street, Red Street, and Blue Street to help people by mowing lawns and delivering groceries for Mr. Baldini to earn money for the car wash. Putt-Putt then helps a car, Mrs. Airbag that lost her baby in the movies, and goes in a cave and finds a puppy that he names Pep. After that, he is the leader of the parade and everyone has a happy day!
Another adventure game! I think I like games with stories. ❤ I guess my favorite part was saving the puppy and saving the baby car from the movies. 
Classicreload: It contains 15 different games and activities for kids 3-8. Some games are traditional such as tic-tac-toe, hangman, word search, checkers and remember. 
I love this activity & game pack because there’s so much to do! Plus, you actually get to play against the computer in games such as checkers or tic tac toe. LOVE all of the games. 
It’s surreal to remember the games that we used to play and actually had fun with. If there are updated version of the game in the App Store, let me know! 😀 What are your favorite games when you were a kid? 

THOUGHTS: My Favorite Perfumes

First, I’m no perfume expert. I’m just spilling my secret here of how I maintain to be irresistible. HAHAHA. Kidding aside, the following scents are just my all time favorite and my go-to perfumes. And, because I’m in no field of pretending to be one, I gathered their description from different websites selling them. 

Second, I will not be listing the prices here since I don’t know most of them. 

1. ENVY ME by Gucci


Envy me was created for the woman who demands attention. This dazzling blend of sensual peony, jasmine, and pink pepper is melded with notes of sweet lychee and effervescent pomegranate and pineapple, and smoothed with soothing musk, white tea, and warm woods, is guaranteed to make her the object of desire.

Peony, Jasmine, Pink Pepper, Lychee, Pomegranate, Pineapple, Pink Musk, Seringa, White Tea, Sandalwood, Teakwood, Sensual Musk.
Daring. Sexy. Arresting.



Escada brings yet another delicious, luxurious and purely feminine fragrance in the form of Especially Escada. This fragrance opens with a blend of exotic notes of ambrette seeds and a sparkling top note of pear. 

3. ROSE by Solinotes


a vibrant perfume packed with full-bodied, mischievous notes. An interpretation embellishing the modernity and freshness of Rose, and unveiling a romantic heart of sweet rose and magnolia.

4. ADDICT by Dior


Flirty and optimistic, Dior Addict Eau Fraîche begins with a sparkling, alluring burst of fresh femininity. Crisp, clean notes of bergamot, grapefruit, and orange mingle with fresh, floral notes and ripe fruits, soothed with warm sandalwood and white musk. 

Bergamot, Grapefruit, Orange, Freesia, Lily of the Valley, Lotus Flower, Pineapple, Watermelon, Grenadine, Sandalwood, White Musk. 
Flirty. Optimistic. Surprising.



Flirty and optimistic, Dior Addict Eau Fraîche begins with a sparkling, alluring burst of fresh femininity. Crisp, clean notes of bergamot, grapefruit, and orange mingle with fresh, floral notes and ripe fruits, soothed with warm sandalwood and white musk. 

Bergamot, Grapefruit, Orange, Freesia, Lily of the Valley, Lotus Flower, Pineapple, Watermelon, Grenadine, Sandalwood, White Musk. 
Flirty. Optimistic. Surprising.

6. ALTERNATIVES: MUSC by Solinotes or FORGET ME NOT by Zara






VENICE: For 2017

I don’t have the perfect resolutions right now, I don’t even have a clear picture of what my goals are for this year. But all I know, or all I can assure right now —- is that I’ll somehow be a better version of myself. It may be a little, a lot, a bit in some areas.. but I’ll be a better one.


THOUGHTS: How would you rate your success?

I’d say this is perfect at this point in time. I’m feeling frustrated and depressed and it’s good enough to know that I’m not the only one who feels like this. 😀



Cinemalaya (August 7 – 15)

Broadening Horizons

Philippine Independent Film Festival


August 8, 2015

3:30        Shorts B


When extreme devotion and unconditional love collide, a mother and her daughter find their escape out of the loophole that binds them together.

A mother, drowned in her own problems, issues and fear constantly screams while holding the statue of Sto. Nino. We only watched the last two minutes – I didn’t really get to watch the whole film.


During a performance, a ventrilonquist suddenly finds himself talking with his past. Will he continue the conversation or remain tight-lipped from a voice long kept?

‘I should not have left her alone. I should not have allowed her to swim. I should’ve been there. I could have saved her and she’d still be here if I did’ – these are probably the things that haunt the protagonist in this film.  What ifs, I wish, and I wonder are usually the conversations that he has with himself. As he struggles with the constant reminder that his daughter drowned because he wasn’t able to save her. Past always find a way back to us if we haven’t forgiven ourselves. He constantly lives in regret. The only way to move past it is learning how to forgive oneself and learning from the experience.


Cinta Dela Cruz, a middle-aged faded actress tries to relieve her glorious days as a movie star in the 1970s by watching films at home every day. One day during an earthquake, something breaks into her window and wakes her up from her Hollywood dream.

I think this is very relevant at this time. When one experiences the spotlight, they hope against all odds that no one takes it away from them. But just like the celebrities today, what would actually be their life after the films stop rolling, after the directors say CUT? Could they handle a lifelong scene cut? To be cut dragged down from their pedestal and be erased from the public’s eyes and memories?

In social media times, where people scoop their self-validation and self-value from the number of likes or shares or favorited, or retweets, we have to ask ourselves, why does these things motivate us?

We have to remember that what others think of us doesn’t matter and what you think of yourself is everything.


A young boy’s journey as they take his father to his final resting place.

I think the film was trying to magnify the sorrow that the boy is feeling from the loss of his own father at the point where he decided to switch off his emotions and let the river consume him.


Tib chances upon an old map that triggers him to retrace the paces that are special to him and his high school best friend, Tric.

Disclaimer: I may be out of line here – but I think Tric was really gay and had feelings for his bestfriend.

But what if I was wrong — Why is it that more often than not, when two people (man & man) are too close, they are ultimately judged to be gay all too quickly? Is it not possible that they only feel fondness for each other as much as they do for their own siblings? Hypocrite, I know.

6:15        Shorts A


An afternoon of love and farewell as Mark and El spend their last afternoon together wishing on a tree, waiting to fade with the sun.

Director’s Favorite Scene: The one where El was looking at the vast body of water and Mark was throwing the pieces of paper on the river. As the writer explains, El was looking at the ocean that represents the countless opportunities that lays ahead before him. While Mark, who will be left behind interacts with the river who only has a limited supply of water that represented the constraints and limitations in his life.

Huh! The writer and director from the way he speaks really thought about the smallest details of his film. Kudos! You’re young and you’ve been recognized! Keep waving that rainbow flag wherever you go. J


Year 1983: Ms. Estrella investigates the case of Carlito Dimahilig, the assassin who attempted to kill Imelda Marcos.

This got a bit boring for me. But before that, I have to admit that I have no particular inclination to history. And I thought – this being one of the finalist – would trigger something in me. I thought this film would bring forth another aspect of the history, one that are not written in books or discussed by our high school professors. But it didn’t.

Don’t fret. You’ll be hearing their college batch mates cheering for them. Love your own!

Marissa lives alone in the dark with an even darker secret.

The director and writer of this film received silence and awkwardness at the start. Laughter and a little bit of screaming was present during the film. And a lot of applause and cheering at the end. It was unlike the others.

Want to know what pertains to the even darker secret? Marissa is an abortionist who feeds her son, the son of the devil, the fetuses from her line of work.  

I don’t know but what probably go to me was that mothers, no matter what kind of person you are, no matter what you’ve done, no matter what the circumstances are – will never abandon their children. And they will go through great lengths to care for their offspring. —– (which made Marissa kill, not just the unborn baby but her last patient in the film.


A troubled man finds his own cure in the vast darkness of his room. Trying to persuade his lover to come back, he discovers a new form of therapy – his greatest ordeal, a terrible encounter he has to escape from.

Director and Writer’s Favorite Scene: When the protagonist woke up and was shot. He explained that the whole film, apart from that scene was a dream.

Okay! So I didn’t get that part without his explanation. Forgive my deliberately turtle of a brain. But I think, the things that destroys us, the things that tear us apart or bring us down is entirely up to us. Whatever happened to him on the film was the product of his actions.


Nenok, a nine year old street kid in Malolos Bulacan adopts the city’s Barasoain Church as a temporary home and his personal space for mischief to the distress and annoyance of Mang Johnny, the stern parish groundskeeper.

So I concluded correctly on this one: the lady who was always beside the boy was his dead mother. On the event that the groundskeeper followed the boy to his mother’s grave, he was enlightened. And that was the start. I guess, we should always look at where the other person is coming from. Maybe in this case, the reason the boy was always making fun of him – the boy was seeking attention or company or just an elderly figure in his life.

And it is so comforting to know that your mom is always watching your every move. To know that she will never leave your side even beyond the grave.

This is the first time that I was able to watch a series of Short Films. The last time I watched an entry to Cinemalaya, I was in third year college – and that was just one.

You know what else? I want to reach that recognition too. Not in the same field perhaps, (although I am fond of making videos of trips, I know it doesn’t qualify but making videos still). It’s utterly overwhelming to have your work – the work you spent hours and poured out your heart and passion into it, to be recognized by experts in that field is irreplaceable. I would probably have my ear to ear smile plastered across my face constantly with my skiddy-hop-hop happy walk.

Congratulations and Kudos, really! You made it! Good Luck and may the best, wins!

P.S. I’ll write about the last film (KASAL – Best film of 2014) during the next entry.

Cinemalaya every year! Yes! 🙂

THOUGHTS: When did Love Letters Die?

6 (1)

When did love letters die? When did the craftsmanship of words faded? When did pouring out your feelings into black and white
became a few punches of letters in our phones? I would give any day to receive any letter like this.

You fear, sometimes I do not love you so much as you wish?

My dear girl, I love you ever and ever without reserve.

The more I have known you the more have I loved. I every way, – even in my jealousies have been agonies of love,
in the hottest fit I ever had I would have died for you. You are always new
The last of your kisses was ever the sweetest, the last smile the brightest, the last movement the gracefullest.

When you passed by my window home yesterday, I was filled with as much admiration as if I had then seen you for the first time.
Even if you did not love me, I could not help an entire devotion to you,
how much more deeply then must I feel for you knowing you love me.

I never felt my mind repose upon anything with complete and undistracted enjoyment — upon no person but you.
When you are in the room, my thoughts never fly out of the window, you always concentrate my whole senses.

John Keats to Fanny Brawne



1. Tell everyone what’s the meeting all about. 

You may dropped a hint when you scheduled the meeting, but remember that you pulled them out of their desks and work to be there. Most of them are in ‘What’s in it for me?’ mindset, so tell them why they are there and what purpose do they serve or what you are asking from them and what they can contribute.

2. Encourage Positivity

Always start the meeting with a positive note. When a meeting starts with whining, complaining and arguments, yo may as well be sure that you won’t be able to get things done, or whatever the purpose of the meeting was. You may start asking what their accomplishment are for their department, may it be big or small.

3. Share a Surprising Statistic or Quote

that’ll get their attention. The numbers may be sour such as, ‘We loss a market share of 60%’. Everyone in the room will now think of that number and instantly want to do something about it. What they wish to do about it, or what suggestion, or comment they have on a particular project or a strategy.

4. Tell a story

It will lighten the mood, it won’t be too serious and everyone wants a good story. But do make sure that the story relates to the goal of the meeting. It may instill a lesson or make people laugh.