BOOK: Barking up the Wrong Tree by Eric Barker: Chapter 4


The Surprising science behind why everything you know about success is mostly wrong.

Chapter 4: It’s not what you know, It’s who you know (unless it really is what you know) What can we learn about the power of networks from hostage negotiators, top comedians and smartest person who ever lived

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  • Paul Erdos loved to collaborate. He lived out of a suitcase and routinely traveled to 25 countries, eventually working with 500 other mathematicians. ‘Erdos Number’ – a measure of how close you are to working with Paul.
  • Research shows that you don’t actually need to know more to be seen as a leader. Merely by speaking first and speaking often – people come to be seen as El Jefe and those who initially act shy in groups are perceived as less intelligent.
  • To get ahead, you need to self-promote. This comes naturally to extroverts and is actually more important than competence when it comes to being seen as a leader.
  • Having a large network opens you up to more opportunities, it exposes you to all kinds of other new possibilities.
  • Introversion predicts academic performance better than cognitive ability.
  • If you can’t stand a moment aloe, get that MBA and chase that leadership position over a passive workforce. But if people drive you crazy, dive deep into your passion, earn those ten thousand hours and be renowned as the best in your field.
  • Adam Grant: Read each situation carefully and ask yourself: What do I need to do right now to be most happy or successful?
  • When we collaborate – the gains can be exponential. But when we don’t communicate, we can end up not only missing those benefits but also getting our efforts jammed.
  • Adam Rifkin: Be a friend. It is better to give than to receive. Look for opportunities to do something for the other person, such as haring knowledge or offering an introduction to someone that person might not know but would be interested in knowing. Do not be transactional. Do not offer something because you want something in return. Instead, show a genuine interest in something you and other person have in common.
  • The Rule of Thumb in friendship: Be socially optimistic. Assume other people will like you and they probably will.
  • The groups you associate with often determine the type of person you become.
  • Thank the people around you. Relationships are the key to happiness and taking time to say ‘thanks’ renews that feeling of being blessed.

 

Fundamentals of Friendship

  1. You like Ironman? I like Ironman too. – Introduce yourself. We all choose to be friends with people who are like us.
  2. Listen and Encourage other toddlers. – Ask them questions and listen. You’re likely to hear something you can connect over. Asking people questions about themselves can create a bod as strong as lifelong friendship in a surprisingly short amount of time. Stop thinking about what you’re going to say next and focus on what they’re saying now. Don’t be afraid to pay the person a sincere compliment. Asking for advise can really help others warm up to you. Ask what challenges people face. Everyone loves to complain a little about the things that stress them out.
  3. Be a giver. Share yout twinkies. – Offer to help people. When people say they’re having a trouble about something, find a way to help.

How to get an Amazing Mentor right for you? 

  1. Be a worthy pupil – When the student is ready, the teacher appears.
  2. Study them, really study them – Spend time and be intimately familiar with someone’s work and you want someone who scares you a bit.
  3. Wasting a mentor’s time is a mortal sin – Asking great questions is a perfect way to build a relationship. Never ask a mentor a question Google can easily answer for you.
  4. Follow up – The key is to stay relevant. You need to consistently hit them with a conversation to keep the relationship alive but without being a nuisance. Do what they said, get results and let them know they made a difference.

 

We all have stuff we can learn from someone else. 

BOOK: Barking up the Wrong Tree by Eric Barker: Chapter 3


The Surprising science behind why everything you know about success is mostly wrong.

Chapter 3: Do Quitters never win and Winners never quit? 

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  • Creative individuals frame their experiences. They regard failure as a learning experience. They try to build upon its lessons in their future endeavors.
  • The capacity to continue trying despite repeated setbacks was associated with a more optimistic outlook in life.
  • Sometimes quitting is the smartest choice and giving up, when done right can make you a huge success too.
  • ‘Self Talk’ – It turns out when these words are positive, they have a huge effect on your mental toughness, your ability to keep going.
  • We’re not always right that we ‘can’t do it’. Sometimes there’s a way out that we didn’t see because we gave up.
  • ‘Depressive Realism’ – optimists lie to themselves. But if we all stop believing anything can change, nothing ever will. We need a bit of fantasy to keep us going.
  • It all comes down from the stories you tell yourself about the world. And that’s something you can change.
  • Optimists shape their stories according to 3 Ps: permanence, pervasiveness and personalization.
  • If life is all about pleasure, then when it ceases to be fun or immediately beneficial, we quit. When we step outside the wish for comfort, when we live for something greater than ourselves, we no longer have to fight the pain, we accept the pain as a sacrifice. And we don’t give up. It’s the stories we tell ourselves that keep us going. They can be a higher truth. Or in many cases, they don’t need to be true at all.
  • Frankl: What is to give light must endure burning.
  • Stories are the invisible undercurrent that promotes success in a shocking number of the most important areas of life. Stories are a filter, imposing order on an often chaotic world. Stories remove information. They make recollections less accurate. They are deliberately constructed, but life often isn’t. Stories can keep us going because of their inaccuracy. Stories aren’t perfect pictures of the world, but they allow us to succeed for this very reason. You weren’t ‘born to do anything in particular but when your ‘story’ says you were ‘born’ to do something, you perform better and persist.
  • A healthy minds tells itself flattering lies.
  • ‘Scrooge Effect’ – when you take a little time to think about death, you become more kind and generous to others. You put aside short-term goals for a moment and consider who you really want to be.
  • Fate is that thing we cannot avoid. It comes for us despite how we try to dun from it. Destiny is the thing we must chase, what we must bring to fruition. It’s what we strive toward and make true.
  • We are what we pretend to be. If you want to be a knight, act like a knight.
  • ‘Cognitive reappraisal’ – telling yourself a different story about what is happening. By engaging in cognitive reappraisal and telling ourselves a different story about what is happening, we an subvert the entire willpower paradigm.

Make it a game. Make your problems, struggles or goals a game and make it WNGF – Winnable, Novel Challenges, Goals and Feedback

  1. Winnable – Each game has clear rules. We intuitively know that and it makes us very positive about our chances if we persist.
  2. Novel Challenges – Good games make sure we’re always stimulates by something just a little different, honing our attention.
  3. Goals – Good games are very clear what you need to do to win. They serve to focus you and guide decision making.
  4. Feedback – the best way to motivate people is by facilitating small wins. Once a small win has been accomplished, forces are set in motion that favor another small win.

 

The Upside of Quitting

  • Everything we do in life is a trade – off. Choosing to do one thing means not doing something else.
  • Opportunity Cost – the price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.
  • Quit doesn’t have to be the opposite of grit. It has to be Strategic Quitting.
  • Once you’ve found something you’re passionate about, quitting secondary things can be an advantage, because it frees up time to do that number one thing.
  • Peter Drucker: time is the most important resource. Getting rid of everything that wasn’t moving the needle when it came to achieving your goals.
  • Know your number one priority. Then start quitting stuff that isn’t as important and see what happens.
  • You can do anything once you stop trying to do everything.
  • Try things. Quit what fails. Then apply grit.
  • The more experiments you make, the better. Fail fast, fail cheap.
  • Moving on from dead end pursuits is essential to the discovery of more promising paths.

So don’t be afraid to do some experiments and quit the ones that don’t work. It can lead to great things. You need to quit some things to find out what to be gritty at. And you need to try stuff knowing you might quit some of it to open yourself up to the luck and opportunities that can make you successful. 

BOOK: Barking up the Wrong Tree by Eric Barker: Chapter 2


The Surprising science behind why everything you know about success is mostly wrong.

Chapter 2: Do Nice Guys finish last? What can you learn about trust, cooperation and kindness.. from Gang members, pirates and serial killers

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  • According to Jeffrey Pfeffer, managing what your boss thinks of you is far more important than actual hard work.
  • Brilliant but Cruel: If someone is too nice, we figure they must be less competent. In fact, being a jerk makes others see you as more powerful.
  • Why do jerks succeed? they’re assertive about what they want, and they’re not afraid to let others know about what they’ve achieved.
  • Ruut Veenhoven: The quality of society is more important than your place in the society.
  • Discipline of continuous dealings: When you know and trust someone, it makes a transaction smoother and faster. That means more transactions happen, producing a better market and more value for everyone involve.

 

Axelrod’s Four Lessons from TFT’s success: (tit for tat)

  1. Don’t be envious – Just because someone else wins, that doesn’t mean you lose. Sometimes that person needs the fruit and you need the peel. And sometimes the strategy that makes you lose small on this round makes you win big on the next. Don’t worry how well the other side is doing, worry about how well you’re doing. 
  2. Don’t be the first to defect – Not only in reciprocity one of the key elements of being influential and winning favor with others but it’s also essential that you go first. All the big winners are nice and all the big losers started off betraying.
  3. Reciprocate both cooperation and defection – Never betray anyone initially. But if a person cheats you, don’t be a martyr.
  4. Don’t be too clever :

 

SIX FAST RULES

  • Pick the right pond – the people who surround us often determine who we become.
  • Cooperate first – Go ahead and send that new inmate a gift basket. When the knives come out in prison yard, you’ll have a lot more people watching your back.
  • Being selfless isn’t saintly, it’s silly
  • Work hard but make sure it gets noticed – Jerks are not afraid to push a little. They self-promote. They negotiate. They make themselves visible.
  • Think long term and make others think long term – a person always discern on two things; whether a potential partner can be trusted and whether he is likely to be encountered again.
  • Forgive

BOOK: Sea of Strangers by Lang Leav


So I only started reading this book about 3 hours ago. But as you all know, this is a poetry book so I had time on my side. Compared to Atticus, Lang Leav’s has titles.
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These are the pages that had an impact on me:
  • New Beginnings
  • Contentment
  • Moving on
  • We Never Broke Up
  • Writing
  • My Life
  • When it’s Over
  • The one thing
  • Smoke & Mirrors
  • Thoughts on Letting Go
  • Over
  • Back to Life
  • Too Far In
  • Borrowed Love
  • Crazy Love
  • Who you Love
  • Transcript of your Heart
  • To Love you
  • Be the One
  • For yours
  • The Girl you once had
  • How it Ends
Although there seems to be a lot pages marked, I also think there’s a lot of poems in the book that had no absolute effect on me. It felt like they were just there to make the book longer and make it seem full.

BOOK: Love her wild by Atticus


Fear of not being able to finish a book for the month of Feb, I immediately resorted to having to read a poetry book – which I know would only require me less time. I know, I know.. I’m taking the easy road here. But forgive me, as I’m busy with planning you-know-what.
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Basically, I finished this book in two days. ❤ I’m not going to share all of the poems in the books but here are just (5) of what I bookmarked. Not my top and not in any particular order.
  • Don’t fear, her father said. Sometimes the scary things are beautiful as well and the more beauty you find in them the less scary they’ll become.
  • Dont give up now. Chances are your best kiss, your hardest laugh and your greatest day are still yet to come.
  • What a strange world. We trade our days for things.
  • Find something that makes you forget to eat and sleep and drink then do it until you die of thirst
  • Chase your stars, fool. Life is short.
I love how I find something that doesn’t really pertain to someone or being in love in general.

BOOK: Barking up the Wrong Tree by Eric Barker; Chapter 1


The Surprising science behind why everything you know about success is mostly wrong. 

Chapter 1: Should we play it safe and do what we’re told if we want to succeed? Does playing by the rules pay off?

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  • When are our weakness actually strengths? Is it better to be an outlier with both handicaps and superpowers? Or do we live better lives at the middle of the bell curve?
  • Differential susceptibility hypothesis: The same genes that lead to bad stuff can actually lead to great stuff in a different situation.
  • David Dobbs in The Atlantic: the very genes that gives us the most trouble as species causing behaviors that are self-destructive and antisocial, also underlie humankind’s phenomenal adaptability and evolutionary success.
  • Hopeful Monster: an individual that deviates radically from the norm in a population because of a genetic mutation that confers a potentially adaptive advantage.
  • Pixar Experience: pixar is thinking that they are starting to lose their edge after ‘Finding Nemo’. They hired a new CEO so that they will have a new strategy. This new CEO’s tactic was to hire the BLACKSHEEP of the company and give them absolute liberty to be creative. Result? a blockbuster The Incredibles”. ‘The same traits that make people a nightmare to deal with can also make them the people who change the world.
  • Idea of Intensifiers: qualities that are universally awful have their own uses in specific contexts. Example, Formula 1 cars are undrivable on city streets but break records on a track. When it comes to the extremes of performance, averages doesn’t matter. What matters is variance, those deviations from the norm. Almost universally, we humans try to filter out the worst to increase the average, but by doing so, we also decrease variance.
  • Mad Genius Paradox: mildly creative people are mentally healthier than average – but extremely creative people have a far higher incidence of mental disorders.
  • Venture Capital Business Mindset: Invest in strength versus lack of weakness. The companies that have the really extreme strengths often have serious flaws. But if you don’t invest on the basis of serious flaws, you don’t invest in most of the big winners.
  • Leadership Filtration Theory: reaching the heights of success requires a dip into qualities that are otherwise problematic.
  1. Know Thyself – In terms of achieving what you want in life, means being aware of your strengths. What are you good at that consistently produces desired results?
  2. Pick the right pond – You’ve got to pick the right environment  that work for you. When you choose your pond wisely, you can best leverage your type, your strengths, and your context to create tremendous value.

 

Too often we label things good or bad when the right designation might merely be different. We spend too much time trying to be ‘good’ when good is merely average. To be great, we must be different. And that doesn’t come from trying to follow society’s vision of what is best, because society doesn’t always know what it needs. More often being best means just being the best version of you. In the right environment, bad can be good and odd can be beautiful. 

BOOK: The Four by Scott Gallaway


Goodreads: Amazon, Apple, Facebook, and Google are the four most influential companies on the planet. Just about everyone thinks they know how they got there. Just about everyone is wrong. Whether you want to compete with them, do business with them, or simply live in the world they dominate, you need to understand the Four.

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So let’s not be a hypocrite. I am a fan of the four, just like everybody else. You have to admit, at some point in your life, you wanted to work for them. I want to pick their brains out, have breakfast with them and find out what they talk about on a daily basis.

Let me list down what Scott Gallaway has to say about the Four Horsemen..

  1. Amazon (Earth’s Biggest Store) lower cost, greater selection and faster delivery.

Amazon’s rise rests on its appeal to our instincts. Bezos realized reviews could do the hard work of retailing for him. Customers do the marketing. By acting quickly and decisively – you force competitors to respond to your last maneuver as you’re entering the next one. It”s core competence is storytelling. They are replacing profits with vision and growth.

2. Google (Modern Man’s God)

Who else inspires so many queries about the unknown from all corners of the world? The insights into consumer behavior Google gleans from a billion queries each day make this horseman the executioner of traditional brands and media.

3. Facebook (Most Successful Thing in Human History)

It’s gaining influence faster than any enterprise in history. It’s algorithm can be used to microtarget distinct populations in specific geographic areas. It offers unparalleled granularity, assuring that advertisers only spend money on people who are already in-market. It decides which content is best suited to convey advertising and who will see it.

4. Apple (Most Profitable Company in History)

The global badge of wealth, education and western values. It counts among its congregation the most important people in the world: The Innovators. Apple decided to pursue scarcity to achieve out sized irrational profits. Apple is the first company to have a shot at multi generational success.

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  • The key to success in e-commerce wasn’t execution but creating the hype around a company’s potential, and then selling it to some rich sucker before the house of cards caved in.
  • The key to success in a multi channel era is knowing which channel to optimize and how to cater to our hunter-gatherer instincts.
  • What can you do that gives you an advantage that’s hugely expensive and that no one else can afford?

TROUBLE

  • All do more with less, all put people out of work.
  • When we allow an enterprise to run unchecked and lawless, we’ve lost respect for the proper standards they, versus other firms get to play by. It only adds further fuel to the flames of inequality.

Five Key Attributes to Success

  1. Iconic Founder
  2. Artisanship
  3. Vertical Integration
  4. Global
  5. Price Premium

The society trusts the four horsemen so much that we allow them to listen to our conversation, monitor our transactions, keep track of what we’re doing and harvest our consumption data. We give them so much power in to our private lives. The four is leveraging big data and has an unrivaled knowledge of consumer purchasing patterns. We have voluntarily handed over all information.

The four have so much power over our lives that most of us would be rocked to the core if one or more of them were to disappear.

P.S. The book’s really good. It will give you insights that you never thought or ever looked into. I suggest you pick up the book, head over to the counter, pay for it and lock yourself in a room until you finish it. ❤

BOOK: What if it’s us by Becky Albertalli and Adam Silvera


Okay, so you’ve probably guessed that I’m into books that talks or exposes LGBT. Right? It’s just that there are countless, hundreds or thousands of books about homosexual love but not enough LGBT love to spread. So when I usually see one, I grab the opportunity and read something fun and fresh.
This is definitely a light read. I have to admit, I have not read a single book from the two authors (but they are definitely on my list). It’s not a stunningly oozing with love but I enjoyed the book. 😀
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Some noteworthy lines from the book:
  • I guess that is every relationship. You start with nothing and maybe end with everything.
  • I believe in love at first sight. Fate, the universe, all of it. But not how you’re thinking. I don’t mean it in the our souls were split and you’re my other half forever and ever sort of way. I just think you’re meant to meet some people. I think the universe nudges them into your path.
  • But what if the story should quit while it’s ahead?” “How do you know unless you give the story another chance?
  • I just need more time with me, I think. To really believe in my worth without anyone’s help.
  • Arthur, the universe just got the ball rolling,’ he says. ‘We made us happen.
  • ‘I’m just going to live in the moment. That’s the only way to see where we end up.
  • But maybe this isn’t how life works. Maybe it’s all about people coming into your life for a little while and you take what they give you and use it on your next friendship or relationship. And if you’re lucky, maybe some people pop back in after you thought they were gone for good.
  • You’re never a bad idea.
  • Being with you already is perfect.
  • I like disasters.
  • You’re going to have a lifetime of moments
  • We’re home to each other.
  • Everything means so much more because of all the hoops we jumped through, right?

 

I love the relationship of ben and dylan! AND, I love Dylan — he’s extremely funny and witty and just overall best companion – where you won’t actually get bored, and may probably be the top best friend there is. I adore and envy the relationship of Ben with his parents. His parents are so chill they can talk about their dates and relationships and just joke around about anything and likely everything. PLUS, I want a boy whose face lights up when they see me. I want someone who gets nervous going on a date with me because they simply don’t want to mess things up, who plans for the date and are just extremely happy just to be with me.

BOOK: EXTRAORDINARY MEANS by ROBYN SCHNEIDER


GOODREADS:When he’s sent to Latham House, a boarding school for sick teens, Lane thinks his life may as well be over. But when he meets Sadie and her friends – a group of eccentric troublemakers – he realizes that maybe getting sick is just the beginning. That illness doesn’t have to define you, and that falling in love is its own cure.

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Highlights:

  • There’s a difference between dead and dying. Some of us die for ninety years, and some of us die at nineteen. But each morning everyone on this planet wakes up one day closer to their death. So living and dying are actually different words for the same thing.
  • The life you plan isn’t the life that happens to you.
  • The thing about being erased is that first you have to leave a mark.
  • ‘But none of them are sadie’.
  • We mourn the future because it’s easier than admitting we’re miserable in the present.
  • Haven’t you ever thought about it? What you want to leave behind?
  • It’s strange how we can lose things that are still right there. How a barrier can go up at any moment, trapping you on the other side, keeping you from what you want. How things that hurt the most are things you once had.
  • We reach for whatever we think is going to dull the pain, and sometimes we don’t even want whatever it is, we just want to not be miserable.
  • Being temporary doesn’t make something matter any less, because the point isn’t for how long, the point is that it happened.
  • Life is getting the raw materials and when we die, we get to make patterns out of our lives and relive them in whatever order we ant. So that’s how you live a really great life. You make sure you have enough good days that you want to go back to.
  • Because that’s all you can do in this world, no matter how strong the current beats against you, or how heavy a burden, or how tragic your love story. You keep going.

 

No matter how obvious it may be for other people, I did not see it coming! Man! Am I slow or have I not read enough books to have a smart guess? Haha. I thought it was lane who’ll die! Nonetheless, Sadie makes me reminisce ​and miss my HS friends when the most of are days are intended for breaking the rules. ❤ And If someone were to ask me, no. I have no clue what I’d want to leave behind. 

How about you? What do you want to leave behind?

BOOK: Little & Lion by Brandy Colbert


Goodreads: When Suzette comes home to Los Angeles from her boarding school in New England, she isn’t sure if she’ll ever want to go back. L.A. is where her friends and family are (along with her crush, Emil). And her stepbrother, Lionel, who has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, needs her emotional support. But as she settles into her old life, Suzette finds herself falling for someone new…the same girl her brother is in love with. When Lionel’s disorder spirals out of control, Suzette is forced to confront her past mistakes and find a way to help her brother before he hurts himself–or worse.

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You know what I love about the book? It’s very open. ❤ It talks about sexuality, homosexuals, race, family, friendship, knowing yourself and being okay with it. ❤ ❤ ❤

Highlights:

  • I know how easy it is to believe you’re doing the right thing if you say it to yourself often enough.
  • It makes me think there’ll never be a time when we question our bond.
  • Maybe you’re bi. maybe you’re not. Maybe you’re somewhere on the spectrum. Bi.. queer… it doesn’t really matter, as long as you’re happy. Just make sure you don’t let anyone tell you what you are. People can be real assholes about labels.
  • I will never be done with you. Ever.

 

I recommend this book. ❤ It’s a 4/5 for me.

BOOK: THE NEXT PERSON YOU MEET IN HEAVEN by MITCH ALBOM


GOODREADS:  Fifteen years ago, in Mitch Albom’s beloved novel, The Five People You Meet in Heaven, the world fell in love with Eddie, a grizzled war veteran- turned-amusement park mechanic who died saving the life of a young girl named Annie. Eddie’s journey to heaven taught him that every life matters. Now, in this magical sequel, Mitch Albom reveals Annie’s story.  The accident that killed Eddie left an indelible mark on Annie. It took her left hand, which needed to be surgically reattached. Injured, scarred, and unable to remember why, Annie’s life is forever changed by a guilt-ravaged mother who whisks her away from the world she knew. Bullied by her peers and haunted by something she cannot recall, Annie struggles to find acceptance as she grows. When, as a young woman, she reconnects with Paulo, her childhood love, she believes she has finally  found happiness.  As the novel opens, Annie is marrying Paulo. But when her wedding night day ends in an unimaginable accident, Annie finds herself on her own heavenly journey—and an inevitable reunion with Eddie, one of the five people who will show her how her life mattered in ways she could not have fathomed.

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Yes, this is a sequel to one of my favorite books, The Five People you meet in Heaven. No, it’s not what I expected. Yes, I was disappointed. No, I don’t recommend it. Mind you, I LOVE the books of Mitch Albom — ALL of them. But this one, really. I was down to page 40 already but there’s no compelling urge to finish the story. It was just more of how did we meet and all.

Nonetheless, here are some worthy lines from the book:

  • All endings are also beginnings.
  • No story sits by itself. Our lives connect like threads on a loom, interwoven in ways we never realize.
  • When we build, we build on the shoulders of those who came before us. And when we fall apart, those who came before us help put us back together.
  • Have you ever wondered how many living things there are on earth? People. Animals. Birds. Fish. It makes you wonder how anyone could feel lonely. Yet humans do. It’s a shame.
  • We fear loneliness, but loneliness itself does not exist. It has no form. It is merely a shadow that falls over us. And just as shadows die when light changes, that sad feeling can depart once we see the truth. The end of loneliness is when someone needs you.
  • Don’t divine things happen everyday?
  • No act done for someone else is ever wasted.
  • This is the disarming power of children, their need makes you forget your own.
  • Did you ever think about getting a moment back? A moment where you can’t believe how unimportant what you were doing was, and how critical the thing you missed would be?
  • Just because you see things straight doesn’t mean you see them in time.
  • What’s time between a mother and her daughter? Never too much, never enough.
  • We embrace our scars more than our healing.
  • When you truly love someone, you’ll find a way back.

 

I’ll always love Mitch Albom. I didn’t like this current book but it’s not enough for me not to want to read his next one. 😀 Mitch, I’ll look forward to your next book. ❤

BOOK: BRIGHTSIDE by KIM HOLDEN


GOODREADS: ”Kate Sedgwick’s life has been anything but typical. She’s endured hardship and tragedy, but throughout it all she remains happy and optimistic (there’s a reason her best friend Gus calls her Bright Side). Kate is strong-willed, funny, smart, and musically gifted. She’s also never believed in love. So when Kate leaves San Diego to attend college in the small town of Grant, Minnesota, the last thing she expects is to fall in love with Keller Banks. They both feel it. But they each have a reason to fight it. They each have a secret. ”
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  • I love how detailed and unreal she describes the character: ‘Smiles aren’t always happy, but hers is. It’s open, content and confident. She looks friendly in the most literal sense of the word, like you’d swear you’ve known her for years, and she knows all your secrets. And still likes you in spite of them. It’s the same smile she wore everyday. It’s the same smile that made everything better. It’s the same smile that was tangible proof I was surrounded by goodness. It’s the same smile that made me feel like the luckiest person in the world.
  • I’m doing cartwheels inside.
  • Sometimes things go my way, sometimes they don’t. That’s life. You just have to make the most of it.
  • If there’s anyone in this world who’s capable of insane amounts of love and who deserves to be loved that way in return, it’s you.
  • You guys have a stellar evening!
  • It’s rare. People don’t take the time to find it. Or they let it go too easily. Or they don’t know how precious it is when they have it.
  • Sweetheart, you could steal my thunder anytime.
  • You’re blushing like a whore in a church.
  • Sometimes we need reminding that it’s all important – the good and the bad.
  • You know, it’s not all fun and some of it is bullshit but that’s life, dude. Sometimes it sucks. But you know what? It always gets better.
  • You’d better squeeze the life out of every single minute.
  • I’m not saying you shouldn’t pursue your dreams, I’m just saying you should not forsake the present for the unknowns of the future. A lot of happiness is bypassed, overlooked, postponed to a time years from now that may never come. Don’t bide your time and miss out on this moment for a tomorrow with no guarantee.
  • He’s owned the crowd all night.
  • She’s his muse. Always has been. You saw what they just did together. No one else brings that out in him. They feed off each other.
Have you ever met someone who’s content and happy to her core? And when you’re around her it’s… contagious? Like you want to be a better person just so you feel worthy of being in that person’s life? 
 
Imagine for a moment that you were free of all the expectations in your life. What would you do? How would you live your life with no one watching? What would your future look like?
 
Katie had an unbelievable gift for making the best of any situation, good or bad. 

BOOK: MAD WOMAN by KAT SAVAGE


Goodreads: 40 pieces that capture her stream on conscious, her confessions, and her strange thoughts. In Mad Woman, she bears it all and embraces her madness driven by loneliness and disappointment.

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Highlights of the Book:

  • I have learned that it’s perfectly okay to wander as long as you never stop wondering.
  • I think I will find love one day. I think it will scare he shit out of me. I’m more frightened that I won’t know how to let it in and I will leave like I always do when things feel so intense. I don’t mind the hurt but the happy can be taken away and that scares me. I think I will find love one day. I will try to let it in.
  • Everyone is human but no one knows what it is to be human.
  • The boogeyman will sometimes look a lot like someone we know.
  • Everything leaves, even parts of yourself.
  • Do we ever really lose anything? Or is it somewhere else being exactly where it’s meant to be?
  • People die over and over again all the time. It’t the only way we can survive.
  • When you strip yourself of something people expect, of something they have decided is who you are, you become truly free. Don’t let them take you under. Don’t let them decide who you are before you’ve had the chance to.

 

Would I recommend the book? No. Although it’s quite short and you can finish it in 20 minutes, you might as well be reading somewhere else. But, make no mistake. There are some worthy lines such as the ones I handpicked at the top. 😀

BOOK: THE RETURN OF THE YOUNG PRINCE


From what I remember, the first and last time I read The Little Prince was when I was still in Highschool which was about 13 years ago. But the book is such a classic so I had no choice but to read the book that wants us to remember the young little prince that reminded us that we were all a child once and that we should always carry that child with us.

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Who will ever forget the seemingly naive and child-like purity in him? I think Roemmers tries hard to portray the simple life altering questions of the young prince before. He strives to simplify the story thru conversations with the young prince and teach him about life thru metaphors and instilling some pictures in the book. However, it still comes out as a heavy conversation for a child to understand.

Highlights of the Book: 

  • All those warnings to protect us as adults, in fact distance us so much from others that touching someone or even looking them in the eye has us uncomfortable and anxious.
  • If you’re convinced you can do it, then you most certainly can. But if you believe you can’t, that practically guarantees you won’t manage it.
  • Humans have developed a great capacity for justifying themselves. They blame their flaws on a lack of love or education or on all the suffering they’ve had to deal with.
  • The longer we delay in confronting the obstacle in our path, the bigger the difficulties grow and the smaller we become.
  • We should always be ready to abandon the comfort of our position and face our problems again and again until we’re satisfied we’e resolved them and make progress.
  • The best way to solve a problem is to think of it only as a difficulty. Then you’ll be able to approach it with a positive attitude that sharpens the mind and beats a path towards more solutions in the future.
  • Be thankful for difficulties as that will allow you to grow and to keep moving up the path to perfection.
  • Sometimes you’ll discover that when you change your point of view, the obstacle disappears because often the difficulty is in us – and it’s nothing but our rigid, short sighted way of seeing things.
  • You create the reality around you.
  • Before we improve anything on this world, there is a lot we need to improve in ourselves. There’s only one way of changing the world and that’s by changing yourself.
  • Whatever cards you’re dealt with, you should be grateful for a life that gives you the opportunity to evolve. Fate always finds a way to make us learn the things we resist the most, the things we least want to accept.
  • All of us have to go on an arduous journey into the depths of our being. And no conquest can offer us a greater reward.
  • There’s always something we can do, even if we don’t believe it ourselves.
  • How do I grow up without becoming serious? When we’re young, we go out into the world and find it’s very different from the one we got to know through our parents. — Injustice, violence, shallowness and lack of love torment us. And instead of spreading light and joy around us, our spirit starts to tremble in the face of reality’s painful but unstoppable advance. As more importance is given to having and not having, the search is aimed at something that lies outside of us which allows us to avoid having to look inside ourselves.
  • The most important thing is to be as attentive and aware as possible, with our senses awakened and our ability to love utterly intact, so that we can exist right here and now, and enjoy life and be creative, trapped in neither the past nor the future.
  • Differences are the first things that attract us and when we admire that, we make it unique. It’s the same tings that interest us and complement us are also used to separate and divide us. The important thing is that you don’t stop being yourself in order to fit with what other people want. We’re all born princes, it’s just some don’t know it and others forget. My kingdom only exists in me.
  • If you manage to communicate something truly important even if it is only to the small group around you, you can be sure that the light will forge its way through a whole horizon of shadows just as the glow of a distant star travels thousand of years of darkness to reach us.
  • Don’t betray your desires and don’t bury them inside yourself until they die of starvation. Learn to bring what’s real together with what you yearn for. In all that you do, give the best of yourself so that your spirit is returned to you, and offer the best of yourself to each person so that they an return your love. You’ll see that the world will become a magnifying mirror, reflecting back at you everything that you gave without self interest. Because the only way to surround yourself with smiles is to smile and the only way to surround yourself with love is to give it to others. 
  • Love yourself, and you’ll be able to love others. Love your dreams so that you can use them to build a world that is warm and beautiful, full of smiles and hugs. If you really believe it, and build it up bit by bit, that world will become real for you. And it will be the reward for all your worthy endeavors. It’s only people who truly love are like stars, and their light keeps shining on us after they’re gone.
  • Any change means leaving a part of ourselves behind. It’s the only way to grow and make progress. It’s painful but we know that the experience will enrich us. As we go little by little, we let go of everything dispensable and hold on only to what is essential. The truth is that without difficulties along the way, it would be impossible to make progress as human beings and discover our true nature. It is at really critical moments that the best of us comes to light.
  • To live better is to draw fully on everything that life offers, and be open to anything that might enrich us emotionally, materially or spiritually. Happiness comes from being and not having. If we were perfect, if we had everything, how will we relate to each other? The simplest and most direct path to happiness is making the people around us happy.
  • Ultimately, if you dedicate your life to finding the best in people, you’ll end uup finding the best in yourself.

 

  1. What is a problem? A problem is like a door you haven’t got a key to.
  • The first thing to do is to see if the problem really is yours, if it’s your path that it’s blocking. If the problem is really yours, then you have to find the right key and put it into the lock in the right sort of way. Some people don’t even find the key – and not for the lack of imagination but because they are unwilling to try two or three times with the keys that they have, and sometimes they don’t try at all. They want someone to hand them the key or even worse, to come and open the door for them.  What happens to people who don’t manage to open the door? There’s no point in losing our tempers, banging on the door and doing ourselves damage.  How  do I find the right key? If you keep on asking your question over and over again, you’ll always end up finding the answer. If you persevere and try all the keys you’ve got, eventually, you’ll open the door.

2. How can you love yourself while knowing your own flaws? 

  • To love and forgive yourself, it’s enough to want to become a better person and to accept that you have always done the best that you could. True love is free and knows no limits It doesn’t seek to satisfy its own needs but concentrates on what’s good for the loved one. If you search truthfully, you will end up finding a reason to love yourself and you will discover that you are a unique and wonderful being.

 

Ultimately, if you want a book that will teach you a two or three about living the right kind of life, pick this book up. But if you’re looking for something that resembles how the little prince is written, you’ll be disappointed.

BOOK: FOR ONE MORE DAY by MITCH ALBOM


Have you ever lost someone you love and wanted one more conversation, one more chance to make up for the time when you thought they would be here forever? If so, they you know you can go your whole life collecting days, none will outweigh the one you wish you had back.

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There’s just a bigger, heavier and harder tug in your heart when it’s about parents, right? I don’t know about you but I usually don’t get affected easily in movies or in books whether if there’s an accident or a tragic event — but when they start talking about parents, count on my tears.

Book Highlights: 

  • There’s only your life, how you mess it up and who is there to save you.
  • I seem to be aging while standing still.
  • When you’re rotten about yourself, you become rotten to everyone else.
  • All that happens when your dreams come true is a slow, melting realization that it wasn’t what you thought.
  • Education is what you’ll make something of yourself.
  • When someone is in your heart, they’re never really truly gone. They can come back to you even at unlikely times.
  • Life goes by pretty quickly. It’s such a shame to waste time. We always think we have so much of it.
  • You can find something truly important in an ordinary minute.
  • You need to keep people close. You need to give them access to your heart.
  • That’s the thing when your parents die, you feel like instead if going into every fight with backup, you are going to every fight alone.
  • When you’re young, you nest in your parent’s plans, not your own.
  • My mother loved me through vomit and snot and bloody knees. She loved me coming and going, at my worst and at my best. She had a bottomless well love for me.
  • Kids chase the love that eludes them.
  • Kids are embarrassed by their parents. Sometimes, kids want you to hurt the way they hurt.
  • You do what you gotta do to hold your family together.
  • You have to work at your marriage together. You have to love each other, your children and your marriage. There are times that you fight, sometimes you won’t even like each other, but those are the times you have to love your marriage. Look at your memories together, they will pull you back together.
  • You count the hours you could have spent with your mother. It’s a lifetime in itself.
  • When you look at your mother, you are looking at the purest love you will ever know.
  • Sticking with your family is what makes it a family.
  • I believe that if parents love you, they will hold you up safely, above their swirling waters, and sometimes that means you’ll never know what they endured and you may treat them unkindly, in a way you otherwise wouldn’t.

 

Times my Mother stood up for me / Times I failed to stand up for my Mom:

  • Mom: visiting chick in school just to have milkshake with him, showing up in every baseball game, smears ice cream just to make chick laugh, tickles him and lets chick tickle her back, impersonates cartoons, tucks him in every night.
  • Mom: Posey scaring the dog away that was chasing charlie.
  • Mom: Posey maid a mummy costume for chick’s first Halloween but it rained so the costume was soaked.
  • Charlie: He yelled ‘You ruined my life’ after being soaked in the rain, ruining his costume.
  • Mom: When posey helped her son finish his homework.
  • Mom: ‘Never, ever tell a child that something is too hard! and never, NEVER this child’. — when the librarian didn’t allow charlie to take the book he wanted.
  • Charlie: ‘It’s not right’, charlie says to his mother’s cooking of baked ziti.
  • Charlie: He revealed that their Mom was pretending to be Santa while she tries her best to make Roberta happy.
  • Charlie: yelling to her mother, ‘You make me sick’.
  • Mom: Posey supported chick when he wanted to invest in a sports bar.

 

Sometimes the stories are simple, sometimes they are hard and heartbreaking. But behind all your stories is always your mother’s story, because hers is where yours begins. 

P.S. Read this to appreciate your parents better. ❤