So before the Holy Week officially started, I got myself three books anticipating that my parents doesn’t have plans for the four day weekend – which apparently is true. So we stayed home for the entire holy week. Good thing is, I got books! :)) I officially started reading one, Thursday night.
Where we belong by Emily Griffin.
It was a story of a teenage girl who felt so loved by her parents but at the same feels so out of place with her family – only because she is aware that she is adopted and compared to her younger sister who is perfect inside and out with her looks that gets men chasing after her, uninterrupted success in her grades and her award winning swimming skills – she is comparably not as outgoing and flirty and generally average. On her 18th birthday, she was allowed to search for her birth mother and when she does, she bravely goes out to her, meet her and be a part of her life now as a TV Director and producer with a hot and successful boyfriend who owns the network. Apart from that, her birth mother accompanied her to meet Conrad Knight – her birth father whom she hasn’t talked to for 18 years after lying to him of the result of the pregnancy test.
First of, I didn’t really liked not knowing exactly how it ended between Marian (Birth Mother) and Conrad. I actually wanted them to ignite the old spark that was once there. And I commend the author for capturing exactly but not entirely what High school crushes are like. Their relationship actually started during a house party – the one where kids get all high and booze everywhere and people making out all over the place, just like in the movies. They hit it off the entire night and had sex during their first night. I have got to give Marian a break. Women always like the mysterious type – because Conrad was not really a loner but he is kind of a badass, doing whatever he likes because it is how he wants it to be, which again, every woman’s weakness – a badass. Plus, Conrad confessing that he liked her ever since day one – proving to her by reciting all the small but specific details that he knows about her (the heels that she wore) for example. Not only is he a badass but a pretty good musician too. With all the days that they’ve been spending with each other, he would always sing to her. And one night when they were figuring out what to do with the result of the test, even without knowing if it was positive, he told her,
“so we’d find a clinic, somewhere we’re not gonna know anyone. And, and I have plenty of money saved from working – so we’re covered there.. And i’ll be with you the whole time, holding your hand. And then i’ll take you back here. to my bed. and feed you chicken soup and sing you a song”. – Well, we couldn’t know for sure if he would really be this calm when it’s positive because she never really told him. But still, he is something.
Honestly, I wouldn’t know for sure on what I would do if I were in her place. Would it make me an evil person to say that at this point, I could have very well chosen not to give the baby a life, he/she deserves? I think that would’ve been the easiest and first thing that I would have chosen. But I also know myself well enough that the moment I step into a clinic to have the baby removed out of me, I would have changed my mind instantly. I will not be able to look myself in the mirror if I do but not necessarily keep the baby too. It would be really hard for me to tell my parents – the strictest parents in the world. So I’d be praying they love me enough to comfort me when I tell them and offer to help me with the baby too. 🙂 But I think it took a whole milestone of courage for Marian to say the truth to her mother, decide to keep the baby and give her away – knowing someone else can provide her a better life than she can.
And if I were kirby as well, – the teenage girl, I wouldn’t also find the courage in me to seek for my biological parents – for fear of rejection or if I was even conceived out of love or pure lust or scared to know that they didn’t want anything to do about me at all.
So raise your imaginary glasses, and here’s to second chances and to mess up situations that would turn out to be beautiful experiences, family that will always support you even though it would hurt them, to best friends who would be frank with you even if it will put them in a difficult situation and finally, here’s to courage and stepping up and doing what you think is right for you, for you and not just for anyone – and to finding out where you truly belong.